The previous batch of soldiers just ORDed a few days ago. So now, i'm suddenly the earliest person to leave the army in the whole company! So i can actually shout "ORD oh!" and no one can say otherwise. Which feels quite...odd, actually. Odd, because i didn't actually think it would come so soon. Odd, because i suddenly feel a bit left out and separated from everyone in camp. At least i've finally got an understudy (like why did it take so long?? answer me, manpower branch!!) who can carry on after me, though. So i don't feel TOO bad about leaving everyone in the lurch in the middle of an exercise... :x
Anyway. I've realised that my chinese language skills have dropped a LOT since i entered National Service! Don't get me wrong; i actually speak a LOT of mandarin in the army. It's just that there're some words that you just don't tend to use very often, and with my hopelessly hopeless foundation in chinese, when i don't use these words, i forget them FAST..
So, just yesterday, i was asking this canteen uncle for "chilli" in chinese...
...and ended up asking for "rubbish" instead. 0_o"
WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF. So embarrassing lah!
And i can't believe i'm posting this for the whole world to see!! What am i, an IMBECILE?? :|
Anyway, i'm jumping from topic to topic a little bit, but i just came back from shopping at NTUC, and while i was there, i saw Jane and Andrew! They were shopping for stuff (mainly dried local food, etc) to bring back to London next week, and i had a little chat with them.
And i felt REALLY odd throughout the conversation; like a little boy talking to an adult couple, and the fact that Jane and i used to have some...history together, made it even more saddening. Here i saw a matured pair, shopping together for things to bring back on their flight back to London, where they were schooling at top universities as scholars and tackling life on their own. Meanwhile, i was just some boy, shopping with his mother, still tackling life with the help of parents, and waiting for his ORD like a little school kid waits for his december holidays.
I felt, keenly, that i was falling behind in the rat-race of maturity and self-reliance, and it felt horrible.
I've always said that issues with religion was the reason why the relationship between Jane and i couldn't work out...which is quite true, in a way. As a free-thinker who wishes to REMAIN a free-thinker, Christian girls and their need to have a Christian guy have been a constant plague in the romantic side of my social life.
Yet, i suppose it was also partly due to the fact that i wasn't mature enough yet at the time (and maybe even now, as well). I didn't know how to ask her out and wasn't responsible enough with my own belongings and my studies...i was a bit of a "closet-introvert" and couldn't be the pleasant, extroverted and independant street-smart guy that all girls seemed to love. Till today, i still believe with all my heart that Jane was lucky to have chosen Andrew in JC2 after the two of us had grown further apart for a couple of months.
Because, till today, i still think i would make a VERY poor boyfriend.
