I am waiting in my trusty red car behind a red traffic light under the night sky. There are roads all around me, criss-crossing each other and going different places. But I am the only one waiting behind that particular traffic light. Each of these traffic lights point to only one place of note. Behind me, cars are zipping past, deciding where to go and which path to take. There are races going on, but people prefer not to choose places where there are already cars which are very much in the lead. Every place has only one parking lot; if you try to catch up with someone who is in the lead and fail, that will only lead to a long drive back to the starting point.
I am waiting in my trusty red car behind a red traffic light under the night sky. When i look past the traffic light, all i see is darkness, and i know that beyond that darkness is a maze, huge and forboding. I eat and sleep in my car, but whenever i can, i stare at the traffic light in front of me, waiting for it to turn green so that i can drive through. Sometimes the traffic light flashes orange, but most of the time it just stays red. The traffic light only flashes green for one car at a time. I cannot drive past the traffic light unless it turns green; the penalties for running a red light are huge. It is strange, because i've already driven past so many traffic lights leading up to this one that i wonder what it is about the last traffic light that scares me so.
I am waiting in my trusty red car behind a red traffic light under the night sky. A few days ago, the traffic light had turned green, only for a moment before it disappeared. But i had not been prepared to drive through; i had been caught off guard while i was snacking on chips. And the truth was that i was not yet ready to drive past the traffic light as i had thought; I knew that most people drove into the darkness without hesitation and only worried about the maze when they got there. But i wanted to be able to plot a path to the place where i wanted to go; i didn't want to get lost and end up back where i started, like i had done a few times before, while attempting to go to other places. I want to make this one count.
I am waiting in my trusty red car behind a red traffic light under the night sky. Suddenly, as i search in vain for the street directory that is supposed to be in my car but is strangely missing, a car pulls up beside me, signalling an intention to drive past the traffic light that i'm at. Suddenly, i realise that i now have competition. The competitor is in a decent car; my top speed is probably better than that of the competitor, but i can see that the wheels of the competitor's car might just be more suited to the type of road that lies ahead of us. Changing wheels is possible but it takes quite a bit of time, and i'm unsure if i'll even pick the right set.
I am waiting in my trusty red car behind a red traffic light under the night sky. I continue to search for my street directory, even as i notice that the competitor is staring straight ahead without hesitation, as if the competitor already knows how to get to where the two of us want to go. The next time the light goes green, one of us will have a huge headstart over the other. Unless, of course, the competitor decides to drive through when the traffic light goes orange, which is quite a good possibility. And who knows when a third car might appear. I still have hope, so i'm not moving away from my pole position. I don't care much for other places for now; other cars can have those parking lots for all i care. But of course, if any competitor gets a big headstart on me for this road, i'll probably have to consider trying out for another place.
Maybe further west, like Katong Shopping Centre or something. :|
Okay anyway, enough of this. I posted this entry to drain out all my frustration where not many people would see, but it doesn't seem to be working very well thus far (or maybe i should just kaobei more). I need to go study or whatever; do something productive so that i can feel a little better about myself. If things were looking up towards the end of last week, the events over the weekend and on monday and tuesday were enough to bring me back down to like below sea level. And i'm not just talking about the ankle that i sprained today, which will take about a month to heal fully.
Which, by the way, kinda rules me out of IFG Basketball. After getting thwarted repeatedly by incompatible time schedules (please take my lesson schedule into account next time, everyone; i beg you...), i shifted my lesson time (rather illegally) just to make it for training...just to get injured. It's as if someone up there is making sure that i never join a sports team EVER. Crap. I suppose i'll just have to play catch up with everyone on the team, who would've benefited from about eight practice sessions or more by the time i return.
But hey, it's not as if i'm a basketball newbie anyway. I'm not going to let this injury stop me...when i get a dose of bad luck which seems to be divine in nature, i tend to want to fight back. Life sure is like a virtual rollercoaster...it has its ups and downs, but well...it's all virtual, anyway. All in the mind. At least that's what i hope.
Well, back to work.
